Meeting Your Shadow: How IFS Brings Depth to Pop Psychology
What Does “Shadow Work” Really Mean? Connecting Pop Psychology, IFS, and the Value of Therapy
If you spend any time on social media, you’ve probably come across the term “shadow work.” It’s become a popular buzzword in wellness and pop psychology spaces, often paired with journal prompts or self-help lists. While these quick tips can spark reflection, they sometimes oversimplify what “shadow work” is really about.
At its core, shadow work is a process of exploring the parts of ourselves we’ve learned to hide, deny, or push away. Connecting this idea to a therapeutic model like Internal Family Systems (IFS) can help us understand not just what shadow work is, but also how we can engage with it in a safe, healing way.
What Is “Shadow Work”?
The idea of the shadow comes from Carl Jung, who described it as the unconscious aspects of ourselves we’ve disowned—whether it’s anger, jealousy, vulnerability, or even talents and desires we were taught not to express.
“Working with the shadow” means turning toward these hidden parts with curiosity rather than judgment. Instead of rejecting them, we ask:
What is this part protecting me from?
How has it been trying to help me?
What would it need in order to soften?
While journaling can help us reflect, true shadow work is much deeper than self-help prompts. It involves engaging with vulnerable inner parts in a way that creates real healing and integration.
How Shadow Work Connects to Internal Family Systems (IFS)
IFS therapy, developed by Dr. Richard Schwartz, offers a clear and compassionate framework for working with what Jung called the “shadow.”
IFS views the mind as made up of parts—different inner voices or subpersonalities that each carry their own feelings, beliefs, and roles. These include:
Protectors – parts that work hard to keep us safe (through control, perfectionism, criticism, or numbing).
Exiles – wounded younger parts that carry pain, shame, or fear.
The Self – our core essence, which is calm, curious, and compassionate.
In many ways, what Jung called “the shadow” overlaps with what IFS calls exiles and protective parts. Both approaches remind us that the parts we hide away aren’t bad or broken—they’re carrying important history and unmet needs.
For example, a “shadow” of jealousy might, in IFS language, be a protective part guarding an exile that once felt invisible or unworthy. When approached with compassion, that jealous part doesn’t need to act out as strongly, and you gain more freedom in how you respond in relationships.
Where Pop Psychology Misses the Mark
The challenge with “shadow work” as a trend is that it’s often framed as a quick fix: write down a few prompts, and you’ve done the work. But real integration involves more than awareness—it involves building safety, compassion, and lasting change in how we relate to ourselves.
Without support, diving into painful memories or hidden parts can feel overwhelming or even retraumatizing. That’s why practices like IFS emphasize creating a safe, supportive relationship—often with the guidance of a trained therapist—before moving too deeply into vulnerable material.
Why Work with a Therapist?
Working with a therapist trained in IFS can help you:
Create safety to explore vulnerable parts of yourself without becoming overwhelmed.
Differentiate Self from parts, so you can lead with compassion rather than being caught in shame, fear, or self-criticism.
Unburden old wounds, allowing protective strategies (like perfectionism, overworking, or shutting down) to soften.
Build self-compassion, shifting from seeing yourself as “broken” to understanding your system as wise and adaptive.
The Benefits of IFS Therapy
Research and clinical experience show that IFS can be powerful in helping people:
Heal trauma and PTSD
Reduce anxiety and depression
Improve relationships and communication
Strengthen resilience and self-worth
Most importantly, IFS fosters a sense of wholeness. It allows us to recognize that all of our parts—even the ones we’ve pushed into the shadows—deserve compassion, understanding, and a place in our inner family system.
Final Thoughts
Shadow work isn’t just a trend; it’s an invitation to turn toward the parts of ourselves we’ve long avoided. Internal Family Systems provides a clear, compassionate way to do this work—one that honors our complexity and supports lasting healing.
If you’re curious about exploring shadow work through IFS therapy, working with a trained therapist can provide the safety and guidance to make this journey transformative rather than overwhelming.